Not my plans.

It's been half a year already since my last post. We've been busy and full of LIFE here at the Witzigs.

Right now I'm able to blog because I recently had another surgery and finally have the time!  Yes, another surgery. One more organ gone... the spleen. It started last Christmas with getting sick easily, often, and having great difficulty getting over it (illnesses would last weeks instead of days). And it has ended (I pray) with this splenectomy. The spleen is part of your immune system and is like a large lymph node. Mine was growing cysts (like my dad) and it was necessary to remove it. We're hoping with the spleen giving its energy to the growth of cysts instead of doing its proper job helping my immunity that perhaps it was dragging my whole system down more than it could handle... so, maybe this winter will be better? I pray so.

In the meantime, the kiddos are enjoying being "farmed out" while I'm recovering. They have gotten to play with cousins and friends daily and are (sniff) LOVING it!! But in the evenings they come home and shower me with (gentle) hugs & kisses... and there is my silver lining :)

However, because of this lapse in my health and an unknown future, we had to seriously reconsider our current adoption plan. After MUCH prayer and counsel, we decided to temporarily remove our names from the special needs list the beginning of June. A referral appeared to be nearing (according to guesstimates) and I needed more steady health and strength before such a huge transition... and now that I find myself recovering from a splenectomy, I could not rejoice more in that difficult decision. But this was not my plan.

This appears to be yet another lesson in how it's not about MY plans. It's about GOD's plans. We just need to submit to Him. Something that's not easy for me to do. And I sometimes wonder if God takes me to the point of surgery just for this purpose. But I've been through this before ... I even thought I learned this lesson last time! And yet, here I am again ... sitting in square one. But even with someone as pitiful as I am, God is gracious and good... SO GOOD.

So until God's time for us to meet out little girl ... we will wait. Not in bitterness. Not in anger. But ~through His grace~ with patience. With serenity of heart. I never could have imagined how peaceful I could feel right now. I let go of what I wanted so desperately and He showered me with quietness in my soul. I can't begin to explain the amazingness of that transformation. But we're talking about God ~ not me. And He's in the business of the inexplicable.

"For this reason we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy; giving thanks to the Father who has qualified us to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in the lights."  Colossians 1:9-12